Sometimes being a mom means you are a motivational coach. “You can do it.” “You look great.” “You are going to do a great job.” etc. are the kinds of things I would say. Recently, an upcoming event was causing one of our children quite a bit of stress and they were feeling less than up to the task.

Self confidence is the difference between feeling unstoppable and feeling scared out of your wits. Although many of the factors affecting self confidence are beyond your control, there are a number of things you can consciously do to build self confidence and these will positively impact what you have in front of you.

To help motivate using what I call “doable steps” rather than just enthusiastic words, here is a list I came up with:

1. Dress Sharp

When you don’t look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. Use this to your advantage by taking care of your personal appearance. This doesn’t mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. One great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much”. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items.

2. Walk Faster

People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step.

3. Good Posture

People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They aren’t enthusiastic about what they’re doing and they don’t consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you’ll automatically feel more confident.

4. Think Positive

Build your confidence by envisioning yourself successfully doing what you need to. Think it through step-by-step and see yourself doing what you want to do. This will help you reach your goals.

5. Gratitude

Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, unique skills, loving relationships, and positive momentum.

6. Compliment other people

When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling onto others. Get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in back-stabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you.

7. Sit in the front row

In schools, offices, and public assemblies around the world, people constantly strive to sit at the back of the room. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You’ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.

8. Speak up

By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.

9. Work out

Physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you’re out of shape, you’ll feel insecure, unattractive, and less energetic. By working out, you improve your physical appearance, energize yourself, and accomplish something positive.

10. Recognize the Source

Be sure that you give credit where credit is due. Recognize that you are going to do your best and give any glory to God. How freeing it is to remember that you are His child and He walks alongside you. Remember, He is a jealous God, don’t rob Him of His due credit.